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10 Important Money Questions You Need to Ask Before Marriage

A huge issue that needs to be addressed before marriage is each person’s belief about money. Too many marriages end due to money fights or money related problems. If it’s one of the biggest reasons couples get divorced it should be a key area they address prior to marriage.  And you can only do that by asking certain money questions.

One would think you could get to fully know your partner through dating. You really can’t, not 100%. Dating is all about making a positive impression. Marriage is when personality, habits, beliefs, etc. truly become known…warts and all.

money questions before marriageThat’s why good pre-marriage counseling is important. It forces you to dig deeper in your understanding of one another. If it’s done properly there will be fewer shocks and surprises after you say, “I do.”

But where should the conversation about money start? What money questions need to be asked?

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The “If Only” Game Creates Liars Of Us All

Hidden Nuggets #27 “Happy is the man who finds wisdom, and the man who gains understanding; For her proceeds are better than the profits of silver, and her gain than fine gold.” – Proverbs 3:13-14


“If only I had this car then I’d be happy.”

Ever heard of the “if only” game? It’s played like this:

Step 1: Look at your current life situation.

Step 2: Figure out all the junk going on that you don’t like.

Step 3: Use the information from Step 2 to fill in this statement, “If only I could change ________ then my life would be great.”

Step 4: Repeat Step 3 as new negative circumstances warrant.

We play this game all the time:

“If only I were out of debt then I’d be happy.”

“If only I had a bigger house then I’d be happy.”

“If only I were in better shape then I’d be happy.”

“If only my kids would behave then I’d be happy.”

“If only my boss would get off my back then I’d be happy.”

“If only…If only…If only…”

The “if-only” game promotes a lie – the lie being that circumstances produce happiness. The dangerous aspect of this lie is that we project into the future and base our happiness level on a hypothetical situation. In other words, we dream of happy life scenarios based on events that have not and may never occur.

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