Hope for your financial life and beyond

A Wedding To Do List For After You Say “I Do” (Infographic)

July 27, 2016 by 1 Comment

If you are inside of one year until you tie the knot with your significant other, you probably have a million things to accomplish on your wedding to do list. OK, maybe not one million but there are a lot of things to take care of. I’m sure it seems like it’s happening so fast. Just when you check one item off another one pops up.

I’m being reminded of how fun yet frantic wedding planning can be by my cousin. She moved to Georgia a few years ago and wouldn’t you know it met the man of her dreams. They are getting married in May of 2017. And it seems like every time we get together with them she’s telling us of another item she checked off her wedding to do list.

The latest item was the biggie – her wedding dress. Her mom came down last week and the two of them picked out the perfect one. I say it’s perfect because no one has seen it yet. And no one will until wedding day which is fine.

It’s drawing me back in time to so many things that happened for my own wedding 20-plus years ago. I’m remembering some of the things we did right, some of the things we did wrong and some of the things we forgot to do altogether. It’s easy to let things slip by – especially after the wedding.

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Filed Under: Marriage, Planning Tagged With: ,

How to Stop the Money Problems in Your Marriage For Good

January 18, 2016 by 9 Comments

Are you finding yourself having the same money problems over and over again in your marriage? Tired of fighting with your significant other about money? Well, you are not alone. Money problems consistently ranks as one of the top reasons marriages end in divorce.

money problemsThis should not be surprising to anyone. The big priorities of life such as shelter, food, transportation, careers, education, healthcare and retirement all have money affixed to them as a central core element. Whenever a major life decision has to be made it almost always involves money.

Then when all the minor day-to-day decisions get thrown into the mix, it becomes clear money is at the core of almost everything we do.

I’ll admit when I first got married I wasn’t prepared for the challenges money decisions would create. I thought we could just out-earn whatever expenditures we wanted to have. The more money we could make the more we could get. I thought, “Money problems? We’ll never have them.”

Nor was I prepared for how each of us would bring into the relationship different backgrounds, personalities or opinions. Money is enough to create problems in and of itself. Mix in those three variables and a marriage could be headed for a host of money problems.

The more conflict that comes with money problems, the more discouraged couples get. Every discussion seems to lead into a fight with both parties not listening to the other and becoming more entrenched in their own beliefs. Before long, they are questioning whether or not they are meant for one another.

It’s such a common scenario but it doesn’t have to be this way. Couples can take steps to solve their money problems and live in harmony together.

Steps to Cure the Money Problems

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Filed Under: Marriage Tagged With: , , ,

10 Important Money Questions You Need to Ask Before Marriage

July 6, 2015 by 14 Comments

A huge issue that needs to be addressed before marriage is each person’s belief about money. Too many marriages end due to money fights or money related problems. If it’s one of the biggest reasons couples get divorced it should be a key area they address prior to marriage.  And you can only do that by asking certain money questions.

One would think you could get to fully know your partner through dating. You really can’t, not 100%. Dating is all about making a positive impression. Marriage is when personality, habits, beliefs, etc. truly become known…warts and all.

money questions before marriageThat’s why good pre-marriage counseling is important. It forces you to dig deeper in your understanding of one another. If it’s done properly there will be fewer shocks and surprises after you say, “I do.”

But where should the conversation about money start? What money questions need to be asked?

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Filed Under: Managing Money, Marriage Tagged With: , ,

The Difference Between Married and Single Homebuyers (Infographic)

June 24, 2015 by 4 Comments

Perhaps you heard that existing home sales rose 5.1% in May from April according to the National Association of Realtors. That’s the strongest pace for homebuyers since September 2009. It’s good news but don’t get too excited just yet. The housing recovery is happening but has been slow and uneven at best (sales were down in April).

The rise in home sales in May was attributed to first-time, younger homebuyers entering the market. These buyers have been cautious about purchasing a home having seen what the recent recession did to home values. Traditionally, first-time homebuyers have made up about 40% of the housing market. Right now that mark sits at 32% so we have a bit to go before the statistics return to normal.

Buying a home versus renting remains a difficult decision. So many variables come into play – from affordability, to employment security, to school systems, to size, to neighborhood – the list goes on and on.

My wife and I bought our first home after we had rented for two years. Job security prompted the purchase, as we were confident my career in education would keep us in one location for some time. We were first-time homebuyers at age 27 and bought a typical ranch-style starter home.

The biggest priority for our home purchase was affordability. We didn’t care about driving distance to work, location to activities or size of the property. We wanted something small but with enough room so we could expand our family (in other words – have children).

Married vs. Single Homebuyers

Had I been single and not looking to start a family, I doubt I would have bought a home in the suburbs at age 27. My priorities would have been on friends, activities and advancing my career. Anything but settling down.

It speaks to the difference that age and marital status have on the decision to buy a home. Where a person is at in life factors into when/if they buy and what they look for in a home. Today’s infographic from my friends at Choice Home Warranty highlights these differences between married and single homebuyers.

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Filed Under: Marriage, Real Estate Tagged With: , ,

Reasons I’m Thankful to Be a Stay at Home Dad

November 26, 2014 by 18 Comments

Six months ago I announced that I was quitting my job to become a stay at home dad. That decision was the culmination of a four-year life transition that saw my wife begin a new career so we could become a one-parent-stay-at-home family. We didn’t know at the time how it would turn out but were willing to give it a shot.

So far it’s been spectacular!

I Am Thankful written on chalkboard

Life has certainly changed and for that I’m very thankful. Not that life was so bad before. However, in the past six months I’ve witnessed multiple issues our family used to have melt away because of what I now do. Plus, I’ve seen new avenues open that could not have been pursued in our previous state of life.

What’s Changed That I’m Thankful For

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Filed Under: Marriage, Travel & Health, Work Tagged With: , ,

Does My Credit Score Affect My Spouse?

November 5, 2014 by 7 Comments

The following is a guest post from attorney Adam Black, a member of the ABA and New York State Bar Association.

Recently married? Have you been married for years? Either way, your spouse’s credit history can have an impact on you.

credit scoreOn many occasions, clients ask our firm if their credit scores, and overall financial situation, can affect their spouse. In regard to how your credit score will affect your spouse, there is some good news. The short answer is that it won’t – your credit score will not directly impact your spouse’s credit score. Although, in some instances, a spouse with a poor credit score can have an indirect effect on your ability to obtain new lines of credit.

Your Credit Score Remains Yours, Even After Marriage

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Filed Under: Debt, Marriage Tagged With: ,

5 Life Changing Moments That Lead to Lifestyle Inflation

July 22, 2014 by 46 Comments

In simplest terms the concept of lifestyle inflation refers to a person’s spending going up as their income goes up.

lifestyle inflationSome lifestyle inflation may be unavoidable but it’s a good thing to keep it in check as much as possible. Otherwise you end up living paycheck to paycheck and having little or no money let over to pay down debt, save for retirement and use for other investments.

When a person is at that point, with no money left to create a cushion, life gets really stressful.

Moments of Lifestyle Inflation

We can be drawn to increase our lifestyle at any point in life. As I see it though, there are five instances when we are most susceptible to increasing our spending. Here’s how it often works.

1. After college graduation at the first real job

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Filed Under: Career, College, Marriage, Spending Tagged With: , , , ,

Four Big Money Issues For Couples to Settle Before Marriage

June 19, 2014 by 2 Comments

Today I am guest posting and commenting at Young Adult Money. Please follow the link below and enjoy the rest of this post.

My wife and I spent a lot of time getting ready for marriage. We dated for several years, attended pre-marriage counseling, and talked for countless hours about likes and dislikes, our families, children and careers.

We didn’t talk a lot about money though. We might have touched on it briefly during our counseling sessions but I cannot remember sharing deep discussions about our views on debt, spending, or saving. It simply wasn’t on our radar.

I believe our experience is representative of many couples…

Continue reading at Young Adult Money…

Next Post: The Two-Faced Giver: When It Looks Like Rain It’s Supposed to Pour

Prior Post: How Being Flexible Saved Our Vacation

Filed Under: Marriage Tagged With: , ,

3 Steps We Took to Develop Financial Success in Our Marriage

March 5, 2014 by 14 Comments

financial success in marriageMy wife and I have had success in marriage despite the fact we exhibit many different personality traits. I am more reserved, take my time with decisions and love to spend money. She on the other hand, is an outgoing, get things done driver, who coincidentally loves to save.

Despite our different personality types, we seldom disagree on financial related things. We learned early on that disagreements over financial issues were detrimental to our personal marriage, not to mention one of the leading causes of divorce in America. So we established some guidelines and parameters for our finances that helped us develop oneness in our marriage.

Steps to Develop Financial Success in Marriage

Our financial decisions have not always been the best. In fact, many of our money guidelines have evolved and been enhanced over the years. Within the last five years especially, we’ve realized more and more what it means to be on the same page with one another. It’s in this most recent period of our lives that I’ve noticed success in marriage growing. In regards to our finances, it all boils down to three big issues.

Listening to each other

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Filed Under: Managing Money, Marriage Tagged With: , , ,

How Couples Can Stop Fighting Over Money

October 21, 2013 by 21 Comments

This is part one of three on how couples can resolve the constant fighting over money in their daily lives.

fighting over moneyTired of fighting over money with your significant other? You are not alone. Money related problems consistently rank as a top reason so many marriages end in divorce.

This should not come as a shock. When approaching anything major in life, the conversation must inevitably turn to the financial ramifications. Big-ticket items such as shelter, food, career, education, retirement, healthcare, and transportation all have money serving as the underlying theme in the discussion. And when all the minor day-to-day decisions are factored in, it becomes clear money is at the core of almost everything we do.

Many couples do not adequately prepare for the challenges money decisions will create. With each person bringing into the relationship a different background, personality and opinion, money can easily ignite a firestorm of controversy as these differences clash with one another. Before you know it, the continuing conflict can lead couples into thinking they were not meant for one another.

It doesn’t have to be this way though. Couples can implement a plan that will keep them from fighting over money. You can live in harmony together. Getting on the same financial page with your significant other should be a top priority if you desire to have financial success and create deep bonds of intimacy in your relationship.

Steps to Stop Fighting Over Money

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Filed Under: Marriage, Relationships Tagged With: , , , , ,

Two Shall Become One: A Case for Financial Togetherness

April 11, 2013 by 25 Comments

two shall become oneI’ve been planning this post to come out today for a couple of weeks. Then, lo and behold, Grayson at Debt Roundup wrote a post on Monday entitled “Love and Money – An Internal Debate.” So I used his post as a springboard for what I was going to talk about anyway – how two shall become one in marriage.

Thanks Grayson!

In it, he propositioned that he would NOT pay for his wife’s debt under most normal circumstances wherein people incur debt (car loans, student loans, credit card loans, etc.). His main reasoning for this stance was so that a lesson could be learned and responsibility taught to the spouse who had been reckless in running up debt. After all, marriage is about making each other better people.

Grayson and his wife sound like they are completely on the same page in regards to how they live out their financial life. They have set themselves up for success by communicating their values and beliefs to one another and then agreeing to move forward together based on what they believe. By all accounts, that’s a winning formula!

The great thing though about personal finance is that it’s personal.

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